I go back and forth about how much I believe in her notion of actual physical harm being done to yourself due to repressing feelings. I do think that stress can do damage, and I often wonder about the long term effects that my body will have due to all the stress from my anxiety. And I do believe that my anxiety itself is a direct result of repressed feelings when I was younger. But do you will diseases like cancer upon yourself? It's interesting to think about.
I do believe that damage is done to your soul by withholding the truth. Your soul can be broken and lost and by coming forward and facing the facts and working through traumas we can eventually heal our souls.
I can relate with this author in the fact that I grew up with some things kept secret deep inside. And overtime they took their tole on me. My soul was heavy. In my early 20's every once in awhile I would burst out sobbing and become very sad that I had these things in my life. It wasn't until I faced them head on and brought all the truth to the surface that I started to feel better about all of it. My soul found peace.
Whatever you believe, the book offers a lot of great insight and advice and its a good, quick read.
One of my favorite parts is where she talks about how journaling is a great way to get the truth out. She says to get a journal (or laptop) and write.
"Be completely truthful in your journal. Say it like it is. If you're angry, be angry. Write it out uncensored. Be who you are. ... The point is to be authentic. When you can trust yourself and be truthful on the pages of your journal, you can trust yourself to be truthful in the world. Just watch how your whole body relaxes as you express your truth. You've given yourself permission to be you- to speak your mind, to give voice to the truth of who you are. If not now, when?"
And I really like this part:
"Trust Life, Trust God
In this moment, do you trust life? Do you trust that you are loved, protected, and supported? Do you trust that everything is working out for your higher good? If you don't, ask for more trust. Speak it: "Show me how to trust more!" Then watch for signs that your life (and God) is listening."
With anxiety, you are always worrying about the worst happening. We are so fearful. And fear does not come from God. If we can have more trust that our Heavenly Father will protect us, maybe that would help our anxiety. I've thought this before but never really knew how to have more trust. And here she says it so simply, just ask him for it.
Overall, I think its worth taking a look at. I still think that the Anxiety and Phobia Workbook by Edmund J. Bourne (you can see it on my sidebar) is the best life changing book for dealing directy with anxiety and how to work on managing it, but this book is a nice side read with a different perspective on the topic. If interested you can find it on my sidebar as well.
Enjoy!
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7 comments:
I like this post...very thought provoking, and I have a lot to say :)
First, you asked "Can we will cancer upon ourselves?". Not sure if anybody truly knows that answer, but I can weigh in on it from personal experience! My mother and I were extremely close growing up, she was an amazing sacrificial mother/wife who adored my sister and I. She lived to make us (us kids and my dad) happy and she was such a strong, independent woman. My parents got divorced when I was a sophomore in college, this divorce was no more than a cheap affair had by my father whom thought the "grass was greener", and eventually married the woman. I truly never found my mother at fault, as I always remembered her to be nothing but giving, supportive and nurturing to all of us. When my father left... my once strong, independent mother fell apart and became severely depressed. For 3 years she wasn't the same, she closed herself off to most things/people she once enjoyed and did nothing but sleep and cry. Four years after the divorce, she was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and passed away 6 weeks later. I truly believe that her depression and overall sadness played a huge roll in her death. I totally believe that it can have a devastating affect if you let it. I, too, fear what affects my stress related to anxiety will have on me.
For me, my anxiety has nothing to do with any misfortunes I've had in the past. Mine started out as missing my birth control for 3 days straight and having close to a nervous breakdown due to that. I've not been the same since. I have always been a happy, chill, fun, spontaneous, bubbly person until about a year ago. I'm working through it, and have definitely learned some coping skills and have come a long way! I have a new found respect for people with depression and anxiety, and it can really suck the life out of you if you let it! I get very angry and frustrated about it, but this brings me to my next point about hope and faith.
My biggest tool on dealing with this is praying. I am a hugely spiritual person. I believe only our Lord can deliver us from anxiety (or anything for that matter). I wake up everyday, and before my feet hit the floor, I am first thanking the Lord for another precious day and then asking that He bless me with peace for the day. I pray that He will give me the strength to give all my worries to Him, so I can be free. He does bring me so much peace. Yes, of course, there are days that I just can't control the physical symptoms and that bothers me. But, all in all, He is guiding us and giving us just enough strength that we will need for the day. He won't give us more than we can handle!
I think also remembering that we are NOT alone and that we are NOT crazy definitely helps.
I am soooo sorry for leaving such a long reply...please forgive me!
"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus" (Philippians 4:6-7).
This verse gets me through!!!
Many Blessings!
I've been reading "hope and help for your nerves" by Dr Claire Weekes. So far it makes me focus on how the process unfolds, which in turn makes me feel alittle better.
I agree that depression/anxiety can have health consequences, if only because we do not tend to take good care of ourselves when the symptoms rush up. Certainly there is data from the western science end (as well as the eastern, as noted in the book you review) that depression can result in fewer 'good' factors in the immune system.
But we as sufferers are already under SO MUCH pressure to 'cure' ourselves. To (CBT) 'think' our way out, or use crystals on our chakra points, or spend twenty minutes each morning moving Qi through our bodies or whatever. We can end up imagining that if we don't do EVERYTHING we are not trying hard enough - and then cancer is our fault - this is terribly damaging. An OCD person who can only see black and white (like me) will go crazy in this situation.
Instead I focus on healing. Whatever healing is available in that moment; either a well balanced meal, doing yoga for a half hour, going to the therapist, taking my meds today, walking outside for ten minutes, calling my sister, even brushing my teeth. All are ways to take care of ourselves and move towards healing. If I tried to think about all the thousands of possible treatments, therapies, strategies, methods, and more - everyone saying 'do this or get sicker' - I'd get sicker :) I'm always open to new ideas, but there is no magic formula. Find some balance, rotate in some new approaches now and then, and just keep moving forward - this is my focus. Keep writing!
Cheers - Blue Morpho
www.anxietyland.blogspot.com
Great great post! Thanks a lot.
Only found your website today but loving it already! :) xx
Interesting post. You know, I really have no doubt that our emotional baggage can cause significant physical issues. I mean, a body's a body, right? I believe it's all one unit and if something isn't right within our souls our bodies will somehow express that distress. Certainly, chronic anxiety can be tied to all sorts of physical ailments; and I don't know why mood issues wouldn't as well. Heck, what about the senior citizen that lost their spouse, can suddenly find no reason to live, and dies? This three pound mass of neurons within our skulls is absolutely amazing, whether it's working for us or against us. Frankly, I'm not so sure I'd ever want its deeply true workings unveiled. There's just something spiritual about mystery.
Great thoughts here...it is very important to take out abuse from the body and let it be free for a better healthyu mind and body.
Ones health is the best treasure of this times...a bad health means not only pain but also a lot of expense to maintain and regain back what is lost.So why go for that...just have and inculcate a healthy lifestyle.
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